Donut burgers!

Speaking of unholy marriages, let's take a moment to consider the donut burger. We get the thought process behind it, we really do. Burgers: good. Donuts: good. Donut burgers: good! But the end result is far from greater than the sum of its parts. The contrast between sweet and savory is far too intense to stomach - who, really, has ever devoured a burger and wished that the whole thing had been glazed in sugar? Nobody, that's who.

And the best thing is that donut burgers will probably kill you, too. They contain around 2,000 calories, a good 50 grams of fat and 8 grams of salt. Mel Wakeman, a lecturer of Applied Physiology at the University of Birmingham, asked the BBC: "Why is this sort of food available?" We second that.

Mashed